Meyer lemons & Kaffir Limes immediatly jump to mind, but ive heard good things about dwarf plums & dwarf blueberry bushes, would have to look into them farther. All of these will require root & branch pruning after a year or two, but that’s basically all woody plants if you wanna keep them desktop smoll.
To be fair, the self-congratulatory threads on Hex are getting old too. Yes, I get it, there was dunks, keep it to the tank.